Analysis

The homie Erick asked me to breakdown the meaning behind the Psychoanalysis verse. This is what i e-mailed him.

Psychoanalysis

at times i ask myself, what the hell am i livin' for
am i making this music so it could hit the stores
collect the digits or.. should i be living pure
do everything for the love like i did before
i aint about flair, so why aim for the figures for
feel like Ric flair got me in a figure four
tangled in weird positions i aint positioned for
i aint trying to grow old in one place like a sycamore
i know people who've been sick before
telling me living is more than material things and getting more, 
and its good to fail cus when life isnt in its course
its interesting to see our motivation to endure
thats why i take time to write, when i hit record
gotta feel right, it dont feel right when its forced.
so my goal is to make music that hits the core
dig deep and speak from the unconscious like sigmeund freud
.....psychoanalysis, 
life is a cycle thats how it is, 
but repetition is the devil
and i aint trying to settle cus that just leads to regretful decision
the message in it isnt, quite the motto 
that readies me for tomorrow
I got my emotions stored up inside a bottle
luckily i found my heart though, inside these songs though
but im still broke as hell and don't got dough. so,

at times i ask myself, what the hell am i livin' for
am i making this music so it could hit the stores
collect the digits or.. should i be living pure
do everything for the love like i did before

THE QUICK SUMMARY VERSION:
I am conflicted with the means of making music. What is the reward after it all? Or what necessarily am I looking for out of making music? Money? Or "keeping it real"? So through the verse I talk about the inner-struggle of figuring that answer. For most of the verse you see me trying to convince myself that I'm doing this all for the love of it. I even tell myself that i should do music almost unconsciously because it should be as natural as possible. If you do anything for any reason, such as money, attention, girls, etc., it kind of ruins the natural form expression. The way you want to express yourself is altered specifically in order to get that approval from others. So I almost come to the conclusion that i should be doing it for the love... but at the end of it all, it leaves you unfulfilled. Its like, i made good music, and then what...?
You kind of notice the insecurity within the delivery where I'm trying to express "is this what i really want?" or "what is it i even want at all".

MORE PERSONAL & TECHNICAL SUMMARY:
When i write, i tend to always write about being conflicted. I'm a Gemini, and Gemini's are known for having two personalities, and these personalities tend to clash with each other. And its not like I have two completely different personalities, but rather, when it comes to certain things, I am on both sides of the spectrum. Examples - I am outgoing, but I also love solitude. I enjoy creativity, but I am also very pragmatic.

I was also in a time where i was debating the reasons of why i was making music. You can only do something for so long "for the fuck it" before you start feeling jaded. I mean, its fun, but at some point you feel like there has to be some sort of reward at the end of it especially since I felt like I needed to use my time in other important things such as work or school. I was hoping anyone who has interest or hobbies would be able to relate with this.

On the techincal aspect of the verse - as far as flow, rhyme scheme, rhythm, it really came about naturally. I had the "living for" rhyme scheme going on for 16 bars straight because it felt right. The vibe felt correct. Everything i needed to say related to the previous bar and nothing was forced. But right after the 16th bar, I changed up the rhyme scheme. I state "repetition is the devil" and the scheme really changes to an unorthodox type of rhythm for the following bar which symbolizes how i needed to switch things up.

As far as punchlines/wordplay, everything seems pretty straight forward. Only one that might have been over some of the listeners ears might've been:
"i aint about flair, so why aim for the figures for
feel like Ric flair got me in a figure four"

Which I'm sure you already knew what I mean. Ric Flair, famous wrestler, his finishing move was the Figure Four Leg Lock which is a leg submission. Pretty much representing how I either feel trapped or how I feel like I'm wrestling the idea between doing things for the love or for the attention.

It is a bit interesting I was able to break it down like this. Most of the verses symbolism and themes truthfully did come about unconsciously. I wrote and recorded the verse within an hour or two and the only reason I did was because it was a long time before I uploaded anything on Soundcloud. Ironically, this became one of the more popular ones. Glad it has been well-received.